Deep Space Negotiator
by mah29732
Summary: Courage, Muriel and Eustace have all been chosen by Nowhere's local military as negotiators to prevent an invasion of Earth by the notorious Dark Laser. Semi parody of Star Wars Ep I.
1. Not Your Usual Negotiators

Deep Space Negotiator

Chapter 1: Not Your Usual Negotiators

A large fleet of space ships of some unknown origin begins to see Earth upon its horizon. Meanwhile, back on the same targeted blue planet, a top general from Nowhere is meeting with members of the local military installation in secret.

"General, we're running out of time, the invasion force is approaching, what are your options?" asked one of the general's superiors who was in the dark shadows.

"This is quite top secret, I don't think the public should be known about this, yet at least" replied the general, "but perhaps we could likely get some locals here in Nowhere to be our negotiators for us."

"Who would you have in mind?" asked another superior.

The scene then quickly switches to a farm house in the middle of nowhere, where Courage the Cowardly Dog was happily chewing one of Eustace's favorite boots. As Courage continued to chew away, he was quite unaware that Eustace was right in front of him without the other pair of boots.

"Stupid dog, you're chewing on my favorite working boot!" cried Eustace to which he then took out his usual scary mask and scared the little pink dog, to which Eustace responded by laughing as Courage ran right inside the house.

Muriel then noticed Courage running right toward her as she was in the kitchen doing her usual recipe.

"Courage, why don't you try my newest recipe" said Muriel as she fed him some of it to which Courage began to have a spicy sensation within his mouth.

Courage immediately then tried to find some water nearby his food bowl and drank it all to which Eustace laughed at Courage as he came into the scene.

"Stupid dog, looks like Muriel's new recipe got to you first!" cried Eustace with joy.

"And just what's wrong with my new recipe, why don't you take a taste for yourself then?" asked Muriel as she then forcibly fed him the strange sauce she was cooking up.

Eustace then immediately could feel the spicy sauce going throughout his body, and like Courage went to try to find water to cool off. Meanwhile, outside the farm house, a limo stopped right at the front door to which the general and some soldiers got out and rang the doorbell.

"I'll get it" said Muriel as she headed for the front door, as she opened the door, she noticed that Nowhere's local military general was there to greet her, "and what can I do for you General?"

"Earth is in a situation that would require your help" replied the General.

"What do you mean by that?" asked Muriel.

"We need you, along with your husband and your dog to be our, er negotiators to prevent an alien invasion of our planet" replied the General.

"Oh my" replied Muriel with such astonishment.

"And we're going to have you, your husband and that pink dog of yours to head to meet with the leader of the invasion force immediately" added the General.

The scene then immediately switches to a space shuttle from NASA to which Courage along with Muriel and Eustace where in astronaut suits heading to a strange large ship of unknown origin.

"Stupid military forcing us to be negotiators for some stupid alien invaders" said Eustace in quite a huff.

"I'm probably sure we can quickly reason with the alien invaders, I'm sure they're friendly" said Muriel.

"I'm not going to buy this one bit, or my name isn't Han Solo and it's not" added Courage.

Suddenly the large space shuttle was then pulled into the large space ship with some sort of a tractor beam. The shuttle then was placed right into the hangar bay of the large ship where robots of some unknown origin were ready with their weapons to greet them.

"Oh my!" cried Muriel as she along with Eustace and Courage put up their hands.

"Stupid stinking robots, I knew it was them trying to invade us!" added Eustace.

"Quiet Eustace, we're here as negotiators to stop them from invading our home" said Muriel.

"Aw, you three have arrived just like that general from Nowhere told me you would" said a dark figure in the background as he became clearer, it was none other than Dark Laser.

"So, who are you anyway?" asked Muriel.

"I am Dark Laser, Galactic Overlord and it seems your planet is ripe for conquest!" laughed Dark Laser to which he showed a little toy dog in his hand, "isn't that right Flipsy?"

"This is the dangerous leader of the invasion force that stupid General was talking about?" asked Eustace with such anger and astonishment, "He's nothing more than a loser playing with some dumb stupid dog toy!"

"That's it!" cried Dark Laser as he signaled his robotic soldiers to blow up the shuttle to which Muriel, Eustace and Courage came on, "Destroy their shuttle, so that they can be given the message!"

The robotic soldiers then turned on their advance weapons to the space shuttle and fired rapidly at it, destroying it completely. Courage couldn't believe how much Eustace had put Muriel and himself endanger with a new villain such as Dark Laser.

"Oh my!" cried Muriel, "How the heck are we going to get home?!"

"If you do what I say" replied Dark Laser, "I might allow you to go home, that is if your husband here doesn't say anything else stupid about Flipsy."

"And where do we stay for the time being?" asked Muriel.

"Take them to the guest room" replied Dark Laser to his robotic soldiers, "I have certainly something quite in store for them!"

As Dark Laser's robotic soldiers took Courage, Muriel and Eustace away to their so-called guest rooms, Courage knew he had to find a way to get out along with to stop the invasion altogether, or things would be quite grim for him, Muriel and Eustace.

"I just have to find away out of here or we're doomed!" cried Courage to himself.

"Get in your guest rooms" said one of the robotic soldiers to Muriel, Courage and Eustace as they were shoved right into it and the doors locked up.


	2. Escaping the Jail Cell

Chapter 2: Escaping the Jail Cell

After Muriel, Eustace and Courage were thrown into the so-called guest room, Muriel was quite furious with Eustace to why he would say such things about the person who they were negotiating with.

"Eustace, I'm ashamed of you that you would say such horrible things about the person who would invade our planet" said Muriel.

"He had a stupid toy dog, and I hate dogs, especially the one that's right here with us!" replied Eustace as he turned his back on Muriel.

"There must be some way we can escape this so-called guest room, it really reminds me of a jail cell really" said Muriel as she began to look around the place, "Courage, you must find a way for us to get out of here, we're counting on you."

"Oh, the things I do for love" sighed Courage to which he began to look at one of the air vents that was nearby a bench in the so-called guest room.

"I'm not getting into that stupid air vent" said Eustace as he noticed it was too small for him, "it's too small for me."

"But we have to get out somehow" said Muriel.

"I got an idea" said Eustace as he managed to get the air vent open and grabbed Courage, "why not send the stupid dog into the air vents?"

Eustace grabbed Courage and threw him right in, after opening up the air vent. Courage screamed as he was thrown right in. The poor pink dog was thrown like a pinball, hitting the various parts of the very interior of Dark Laser's ship until he managed to land on a small platform with Courage all beaten up laughing at his own predicament. After recovering from that, Courage then began to crawl throughout the air vent network of the ship and spotted one opened air vent to which Dark Laser was in his private chamber with his toy dog Flipsy.

"Aw Flipsy" said Dark Laser as he placed the toy flipping dog on a pillow, "it wasn't really nice for those so-called negotiators to call you all those horrible names. I couldn't imagine what to do if I didn't lead the invasion of the blue planet Earth with you beside my side."

Courage then immediately had an idea come up in his head. So he waited until Dark Laser went to his bed and took a nap. He immediately opened the air vent and went right into Dark Laser's private chambers. Courage wanted to be quiet not to wake Dark Laser, so he quickly grabbed Flipsy from its pillow and raced right back up to the air vent. When Dark Laser woke up, he noticed that his flipping toy dog-Flipsy was gone.

"Flipsy, no!" cried Dark Laser to which he then noticed that an air vent on the ceiling of his private chamber was opened, "Those so-called negotiators are responsible for this! I'll find my Flipsy and then when I do, I'll fire those negotiators right into deep space itself and then invade their home planet!"

Suddenly, as Courage went through crawling through the air vent network of the ship, he heard sirens going off throughout the ship as Courage knew Dark Laser was missing his Flipsy that he was carrying. He then raced and crawled back to the place where Eustace and Muriel were being held. As he got out of another air vent that was near the door of the cell, the two robotic soldiers whom were guarding the cell noticed Courage with Flipsy.

"Sir, we have spotted the pink stupid dog holding your Flipsy" said the first robotic soldier on its communicator, "we're moving in."

As the two robotic soldiers raced to apprehend Courage, Courage grabbed the bars of the air vent that he had come out and used it as a weapon by throwing it at the robotic soldiers destroying them both. He then noticed that one of the two robotic soldiers had keys and grabbed the keys and unlocked the jail cell that Muriel and Eustace were in.

"Courage, you did it!" cried Muriel with joy.

"For once, you stupid dog" added Eustace.

Courage then showed both of them Dark Laser's prized possession-Flipsy the flipping toy dog within his hands showing how this could be used as a bargaining chip to prevent Dark Laser from invading the Earth.

"Say, that's the stupid toy dog you got there" said Eustace, "we don't need something as stupid like that."

"Are you mad?" asked Muriel to Eustace, "We could give our host back his possession, providing that he won't invade our home."

"Yeah!" cried Courage with joy.

"But we better hurry and try to get to a hangar or some place where we could negotiate its release" said Muriel.

Suddenly some of the robotic soldiers busted right into the area of where the three were.

"There they are, I knew they stole Flipsy, get them!" cried Dark Laser as he came into the scene, "But don't harm Flipsy!"

Muriel, Eustace and Courage then immediately ran for their lives as they were dodging the various lasers coming right toward them from the blasters of the robotic soldiers. The three raced throughout the entire ship, trying to dodge the various robotic soldiers to which Dark Laser had ordered them to search and find them.

"We just have to find a way out of here, I know there's a way we can do it" said Muriel.

"I say we get rid of this stupid toy" said Eustace as he grabbed it from Courage, "this stupid toy is what's causing all the problems. I say I'm going to take it for me self!"

"Eustace, have you gone mad, we need that to give back to Dark Laser, as long as he won't invade our home planet" said Muriel.

"Forget it" said Eustace as he held Flipsy in his arms, "it's going to cost this Dark Laser money if he wants it back!"

"Courage, we have to stop him!" cried Muriel as Eustace left the scene laughing and having the time of his life.

"Halt, you two are not going anywhere!" cried Dark Laser as he used his powers to levitate them in the air, "Now where is Flipsy!"

"We don't have it!" cried Muriel.

"Then who does!" cried Dark Laser.

"Hey, Dark Stupid, looking for this?" laughed Eustace as he had a fancy space pilot suit on and was heading to the hangar, "You want it back you're going to have to get it from me!"

Eustace immediately left the scene laughing at both Muriel and Courage's poor predicament to which only angered Dark Laser even further.


	3. Eustace Flees

Chapter 3: Eustace Flees

Eustace was running right into the hangar bay with Flipsy being held as a hostage. He immediately got onto a shuttle and pushed the pilot out of the way.

"Move it, I'm taking this ride!" cried Eustace as he pushed the robotic pilot out of the way sending it crashing right onto the ground damaging part of the pilot.

The robotic pilot then laughed at its own predicament as it was quite damaged on the hangar bay. Just as Eustace took off in the shuttle, Muriel, Courage, Dark Laser and his robotic soldiers came right into the scene.

"No, Flipsy, he's gone!" cried Dark Laser as he slammed his fist right on the floor to which he then began to cry like a baby.

"Courage, we have to do something for him" said Muriel, "I know he might be some sort of a deep space tyrant, but he has feelings to."

"Oh, I know I'm not going to like it, but I'll do it anyway" said Courage.

"Get back my Flipsy" said Dark Laser as he pulled on Courage's fur, "please. Do it, and I promise I won't try to invade Earth, at least this time around. You can take my second most prized personal shuttle to go search for him."

"Yea!" cried Courage.

Courage was then immediately led to another shuttle that was supposedly in the main ship to lead the invasion of Earth. He got onto the star fighter and began to press some buttons and headed off toward where Eustace was heading. Back in the shuttle which Eustace had stole, he was holding Flipsy beside his side.

"I don't understand why some deep space tyrant such as Dark Laser would want to keep something as stupid as you" said Eustace to which he realized he was talking to a mere toy, "I mean look, I'm even talking to a mere stupid toy like you. It would be worse if you were shaped like that stupid dog that I have."

As Eustace began to steer the shuttle away from the invasion fleet to avoid detection, he then noticed that Courage was right behind him as he could see it through a mirror on the outside of the shuttle.

"It's that stupid dog, he's trying to get me prize" said Eustace to which he then noticed an asteroid field not far away, "looks like I can loose that stupid dog in that asteroid field. Maybe his ship would crash. Wouldn't that be a sight to see, mwhaha!"

Courage himself, also noticed the asteroid field which wasn't far away. He had shivers down his spin, that one mistake he would certainly not be pleased with the results.

"I got to get that toy dog back" said Courage as he then began to steer the star fighter right into the asteroid field, "the things that I do for love."

Courage then headed right into the asteroid field following Eustace who was not too far behind.

"Give back that toy dog!" cried Courage who pressed a button which was the speakers for the star fighter to be aimed at Eustace.

"Make me!" replied Eustace as he pressed the same communications speakers button on the shuttle he had stolen.

It was quite a literally cat and mouse game between Courage and Eustace. Eustace then began to make various maneuvers as best as he could with the shuttle that he had stolen. But he soon began to realize that he didn't take the right sort of ship to evade Courage.

"Stupid ship, why don't you go faster!" cried Eustace as he began to hit and push the buttons on the control console, he then noticed that there was an asteroid base that had an abandon mining facility on it, the perfect place where he could evade Courage, "Now that's a hideout for me!"

As Eustace began to land his shuttle on the abandon mining facility on the asteroid, Courage overlooked the asteroid to which Eustace had landed on. He tried to search for Eustace as best as he could, but he couldn't find him without any luck.

"Courage, Courage, have you found Eustace and this toy dog Flipsy yet?" asked Muriel whom was on the communicator on the other line.

Courage in his own language attempted to speak toward Muriel that he couldn't seem to find Eustace anywhere in the asteroid field. It's as seem as Eustace had vanished from the scene. But back at the asteroid to which Eustace landed on, Eustace got out of the shuttle with Flipsy holding in his hand and entered the abandon mining facility which was quite large.

"This place is perfect for me!" laughed Eustace to which he then began to notice a control panel, "Now let's see, where is the place were I can broadcast me demands toward this Dark Laser with his precious Flipsy. Ah, ha there we go!"

Meanwhile back on the main ship where poor Dark Laser was still not quite himself, he was still morning the loss of Flipsy as he was in the main control room with Muriel who was trying to calm him down.

"There, there, calm down, I'm pretty sure Courage will do all that he can to save your Flipsy" said Muriel.

"I don't think that I have enough strength to even be mad at you" cried Dark Laser as he blew on a tissue, "I can't even lead the invasion of your planet or any other planet without him!"

"Sir, we're getting communications from an abandon mining facility within the asteroid" said one of the robotic soldiers to Dark Laser.

"Maybe it's Eustace, I think he might have managed to find a way to evade Courage" said Muriel.

"Put whoever is there on screen" said Dark Laser, "I think I have a plan to find where this Eustace is hiding so that I can get back my Flipsy."

The computer screen then showed up the face of Eustace Bagge with Flipsy beside him.

"It's about time I got to see your stupid face again" laughed Eustace mocking Dark Laser, "I have your precious, stupid toy dog that you want."

"Eustace, this isn't worth it" said Muriel, "just give up the toy dog to this poor man."

"Poor!" laughed Eustace as he noticed Dark Laser crying trying to reach for the computer screen where Flipsy is, "Look how I reduced a deep space tyrant like Dark Laser. My demands are simple. I want to be the richest man in the known galaxy, if you want your precious Flipsy back, all you have to do is do what I say from now on!"

But what Eustace didn't know was that Dark Laser's robotic soldiers were inputting Eustace's coordinates to Courage who was way off course to locating him.


	4. Finding Eustace

Chapter 4: Finding Eustace

Courage knew that he had to find Eustace if he wanted to stop Dark Laser from invading his home planet. He then noticed that there were coordinates being inputted into his star fighter showing him the location of the abandon mining facility that he didn't see while he had chased Eustace earlier in the asteroid field.

"Oh, the things that I do for love" sighed Courage as he knew he had to go back into the asteroid field to search for Eustace.

Meanwhile, back at the abandon mining facility, Eustace was having the time of his life showing off Flipsy to Dark Laser who was weeping and crying like a baby on the other line along with Muriel not knowing what to do.

"Listen to me Dark Stupid, if you wish for your precious stupid toy dog back, you're going to have to do as I say or I'm going to throw your precious toy dog deep into the abyss of this abandon mining facility where you'll never find it ever again!" laughed Eustace.

"Eustace, this has gone too far, just come back to the ship and I'm sure Dark Laser's soldiers would not bring that much harm to you knowing that you have Dark Laser's precious Flispy" said Muriel.

"Sorry, I'm not going back to that ship until I get me money from this deep space tyrant, then he can have his stupid toy dog back!" laughed Eustace.

"But if I do that, I won't have enough money to pay off my robotic workers, not to mention members of my own fleet" said Dark Laser as he still had a tear in his eyes from all the crying of the lose of Flipsy.

"Big deal" said Eustace as he had little care for Dark Laser, "give me my money, or no more stupid toy dog!"

Eustace then turned off the communications console, and the computer screen then went away.

"That'll teach someone like that not to invade me home planet, and when I finally get what I want, I'll be quite rich!" laughed Eustace.

Meanwhile, back in the asteroid field, Courage had managed to find the asteroid to which Eustace had landed his shuttle on. He then immediately recognized an abandon mining facility to which he then noticed the shuttle Eustace had stolen earlier. He immediately landed his star fighter not far from the shuttle and quickly raced toward the abandon mining facility. As he finally approached the entrance of the abandon mining facility, he could hear Eustace's cries of joy knowing that he would become quite rich with the ransom money.

"I got to get that toy dog back, but how?" asked Courage to himself to which he had an idea popped right up in his head.

He then began to disguise himself as a space miner and created a phony mining badge. After that, he then knocked right on the door to the abandon mining facility to which startled Eustace who wasn't expecting company.

"Say, who the heck could be at the door" said Eustace as he answered it to which revealed what looked like to be a mining facility inspector which Courage was disguised as, "say, are you a mining inspector, let me see your badge then?"

Courage then immediately showed Eustace his fake badge. As Eustace was carefully examining the badge along with the ID Courage had created he didn't know that Courage was sneaking right up to the toy dog-Flipsy.

"Say, wait a minute, this looks like a fake to me!" cried Eustace with quite astonishment to which he then noticed it was Courage who was just about to take Flipsy, "Hey stupid dog, get your hands off of that stupid toy dog, I need that to get rich!"

Courage then screamed for his life as he then grabbed Flipsy. He then ran right under between Eustace's legs as he attempted to grab Courage and the toy dog.

"Come back here, you stupid dog!" cried Eustace as he shook his fist.

The little pink dog then made his way back to the star fighter that was near the shuttle and immediately took off from there.

"I'm going to make sure you're going get it!" cried Eustace as he got back on his shuttle and began to start the engines.

The shuttle to which Eustace was piloting then began to follow Courage throughout the asteroid field. Eustace then pressed some buttons which began to fire the shuttle's lasers trying to target poor Courage.

"Stupid dog, if I can't have that stupid toy dog, no body can!" laughed Eustace as he started to blast away.

Courage immediately then began to use the communications command on the star fighter to contact Dark Laser and Muriel who were on the main ship.

"It must be Courage!" cried Muriel with joy, "He must have found your toy dog Flipsy."

"Flipsy, I'll be happy to be reunited back with him!" cried Dark Laser also with quite joy.

"Sir, it appears that the crazy Earth farmer is firing upon the star fighter carrying Flipsy and Courage" said one of the robotic soldiers to Dark Laser.

"What!" cried Dark Laser, "He's trying to destroy my Flipsy!"

"And my Courage!" added Muriel.

"Send fighters to help that pink dog bring back my Flipsy" said Dark Laser, "and as for the shuttle carrying the crazy Earth farmer, disable it so that I can personally punish him myself!"

Meanwhile, back to the chase scene, Eustace was having the time of his life trying to fire lasers at poor Courage who was trying to avoid him as best as he could. Courage then noticed several star fighters coming from the main ship where Dark Laser and Muriel were and they began to help escort Courage back to the main ship.

"Stupid Dark Laser, this is mine fight with that stupid dog, not yours!" cried Eustace.

Suddenly the star fighters which helped escorted Courage back to the main ship began to turn their weapons on Eustace.

"Uh oh" said Eustace as he began to try to get the shuttle to leave the area ASAP, but failed as he soon found out that the star fighters had disabled the shuttle's engines and began to hit the shuttle's console with his fists, "stupid piece of junk!"

Meanwhile back on the main ship, Courage had arrived back to which Courage happily handed Dark Laser his precious Flipsy.

"Flipsy, I missed you so much!" cried Dark Laser.

"And do you promise to not invade our planet?" asked Muriel.

"Of course, risking poor Flipsy here is too much for such an act" said Dark Laser.

"Yeah!" cried Courage.

Suddenly a computer screen of the Nowhere General then showed up with his superiors in the shadows.

"Good work" said the General to Courage and Muriel, "you two have stopped an invasion that would have risked the safety of the planet. Say, what happen to the third negotiator?"

"Oh, I'll give him the proper punishment for causing harm to Flipsy" laughed Dark Laser.

The scene then immediately switches to where Eustace is dragged into the main room of the ship in a dog costume similar to Flispy's colors, with Dark Laser sitting on the throne.

"You, Earth farmer, flip!" commanded Dark Laser.

"Make me!" replied Eustace.

Dark Laser then immediately used his powers and levitated Eustace to force him to flip.

"Now this is what I call teaching a farmer a new trick!" laughed Courage as he was there with Muriel watching it, to which the scene promptly ends.


End file.
